Saturday, December 31, 2005

Another year

A solemn day for sure, I grow very tired of new year bullshit. I grow tired of the lonliness and the void in my life right now. I spent 3 years with someone who I could never really love the way that she wanted and the same back. Although we did share a connection, it wasn't enough. Today I miss that connection and I am frustraited trying to find one with another. I find it difficult to meet new people as I tend to dislike functions of large people. I dont talk to anyone at the bar. Nor do I have a good feel as to who is around my age. I don't know how to spark up conversations and I lack the basic teenage start of a relationship. I didnt have my first date till I was 19. I missed out on a growing phase that is now leaving me depressed and lonely.

I suppose this is more a self inflicted thing. I got some movies that I thought wouldn't be laced in romanticism, yet were. I saw the Wedding Crashers and Bewitched. Stop laughing in the back there. So now I feel alone, I am spending new years eve alone, in my bedroom, blogging.

Merry fucking new years

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